Just some complaints

Wow so long away from blogging I didn't even know about the change of layout here. Quite a clean and minimalistic one I'd say, not a fan of orange but it will do. Reminds me of the google layout a bit, that explains, isn't blogger somewhat google's? I'm not sure. Anyway, felt like blogging suddenly. I didn't blog about supposedly blog-worthy events such as YEP, exams, DU, beerfest and what not. Guess my brain just don't work in that way that I want to document every mentionable thing anymore. Kind of always work by the gut feeling when I feel like it it will happen. So here I am wanting to blog. Just this little thing that happened at dinner just now that annoys me to no end. This dude, BIG dude, offended me by being rude to my Dad. Well, my Dad being the soft big teddy bear he is, took no notice obviously, maybe that is his way of driving offenders crazy. But while I watched on the sideline, I wished I have sharp teeth which I can sink into the guy's neck and tear out his bloody neck as beastly as I could imagine. I admit, I have morbid thoughts and derive morbid pleasures out of blood and gore, well at least "well-made" ones. Then I went up and gave the guy the meanest and most provocative look I can get away with and there it gave me pleasure to see him fucking pissed. Maybe deep down I am a sucker for drama. Maybe deep down I should live in the woods not in this pretentious thing called civilisation. It just occurred to me that this man, way older than I am is pissed off by my obvious provocation, and till the end of the dinner he continues glaring at my Dad, if I had seen it, I would shove a finger in his face but I totally forgot about him over dinner until Dad told me. Not that I approve of my Dad's way of silent ignore, but I would feel inwardly annoyed much if I were that guy coz apparently my provocations are not being registered. But to me, a third party who secretly wishes for more drama, its not so nice, because there is no sense of moral civility towards people both way senior or way junior than you. That is something I was taught to respect my whole life, and it's super weird to see that nobody here knows about it. Don't these people go through moral education as well, despite thinking that the lessons are bullshit, but the teachings well, stuff that you would wish you could teach your kids, are good values to pass on, no? Like respecting your elders, being civil with small kids, or juniors. There is social expectations to adhere to in relation with people around you. And obviously this man decides to bear a grudge with me who is significantly his junior. It's like getting angry at a kid who just wants to piss you off. And there I realize how screwed up this society is. No offense really. But a society that requires the law to do the work of morality is pretty screwed up in my opinion. Not to say the conflicting views of the west and the east, the confused perception of themselves the people have here. I still have a problem with their twisted pride in not being able to speak and understand their own mother-tongue, I honestly despise it. This I have gone through so many times, trying to get over it but I can't. It's an outright refusal to accept your roots, no? Trying to deny your ancestry and inching closer to something seemingly "cool" but in no way part of your identification. And this is why I never really liked this society at all. To be continued...