I'm not exactly sure what Reconcile means, I just have the feeling that it's somewhat relevant to how I am feeling now. Now in the limited comfort the sofa can offer.
Everytime my grandparents and my parents talk to me about my childhood memories, I feel so proud, I was the embodiment of what I want to bewhen I was young. I was adventurous, bold and unafraid. I realized my fear for social activities was more innate than I thought because as a kid I disliked big groups of unfamiliar people even though they were kids like myself. But at other points where I'm not socially handicapped I'm quite a friendly entertainer who loved others to take a piece of her joy. I was really what I want to be now.
Evaluating who I am now, I impress myself less than I did when I was a kid. I am more fearful towards things unknown and I am less determined. Albeit I'm still as socially handicapped as ever, if not more.
Recently I find it hard to accept my shortcomings I don't know why. I always subconsciously try to impress people with my nonchalance or random spontaneity. As fake as I hate to be.
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